So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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