you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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