You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
