we're chasing vodka with high fives
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize