need another drink. this is the easiest way
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
