Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
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