Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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