After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize