Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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