I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
