Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
