Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
