She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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