stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I'm getting married
To pizza
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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