i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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