Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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