every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
