In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
