I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
