Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
