That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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