I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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