So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize