Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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