how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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