Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
