Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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