their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
