Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
