Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Don't tell me you're on acid again
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
