You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
