Sry I called you an 8
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
