So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
