addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
