I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
