Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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