Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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