Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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