So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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