Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Randomize
