Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
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