This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
