he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
