I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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