I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize