Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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