Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
