Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
