Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
So much Jack, so little girl.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
