It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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