i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
